Dear Chechies,
We just dropped you off at your Abuela’s house. I stayed in the car so I could calm down your sister and didn’t get to give you a besito before we left. I’m sorry baby girl. Normally, you are SO excited to spend the night with Abuela and eat Arepitas and watch all the TV you want – but today something was different. The way you cried at the doorstep brought tears to my eyes. The last few days have been different. I can see it in your eyes – you miss me. And Baby Girl, I miss you too!
I’m so vain, I probably think this song is about me… I get it. But since your sister arrived, nothing’s been the same. Instead of my usual participation in your wildly imaginative princess scenarios, or the morning drives to Starbucks to read books and talk – Mommy sits in a rocking chair, feeds Milena, and asks you for a variety of “little favors”.
Chechies, grab Mommy’s that blanket over there pretty please?
Mamita, please turn off Milena’s swing for me?
Please stop bouncing & jumping around your sister baby girl, you have to be careful!
I feel like a terrible mom – because I DO miss the days when it was just us two at home. Your silly smile as we walked up to the “Mooquarium”, sitting next to you as your princess dolls carried on elaborate conversations, watching you get “married” to your various stuffed animals. As much as I complained that you wouldn’t nap, or you had to eat so many times a day or your tempter tantrums were spiraling out of control… I miss that time, because you’d tell me over and over, “Mom, we’re best buddies!” And I haven’t been a very good buddy lately.
But hang in there Chechie Linda. I may not be there like I used to, but when it matters most I promise I will be there for you. You’re one of the luckiest kids on the planet – You’ve got awesome friends who come over and spend time playing with you! What three year old’s best friends are grown adults? Yours baby girl, because you’re that special.
And while I may not be the engaging, energetic Mommy you loved – I’m busy getting your little sister ready to take my place as your best buddy. I can’t wait to watch you two play together, and make up silly songs together, and drive me absolutely batshit crazy – TOGETHER. .
It’ll get better Mamita – and although things will never be like it used to… It will only get better. Just have a little patience and life will be so much more wonderful. I love you
Laura says
OMG Amanda…. This is so sweet but so sad… But sweet! Chechies is lucky to have you as a mommy!
dania says
I know how you feel love , but it was beautifully written !!!!!
dpums says
This is the sweetest! Love it, Amart. I love reading all of your stuff. I love the way you write! You are a wonderful mommy and you are doing your best. You have two very lucky little girls! Love you boo!
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